Kenneth Fong was only 13 when he found blood in his urine. This was in 1978. By the time the doctors figured out what was going on in his kidneys three years later in 1981, he was told that he would only have 10 years left before his kidneys packed up.

But Mr Fong, a civil engineer turned bible-college student, celebrated his 42nd birthday two months ago.

To document his 30-year fight against kidney failure and to give hope to fellow sufferers, he and his wife have published a book entitled Why Me, God?

Painful reality
Back then, doctors had explained to Mr Fong that he had a particular condition called IgA nephropathy, also known as Berger's Disease.

This is where the tiny filters inside the kidneys are damaged by an unusual accumulation of protein.

According to the United States National Kidney Foundation in New York, the IgA protein, an antibody, is a normal part of the body's immune system and helps fight diseases.

Medical science still cannot explain exactly why in some people this protein accumulates in the kidney's filters - but it blocks the natural process of removing toxic waste products from the blood.

The chronic kidney disease can progress over a period of 10 to 20 years.

Mr Fong told Mind Your Body that he believes now that the condition was triggered by a prolonged fever he had while he was a toddler - and this triggered his immune system into attacking his kidneys.

With the warning that his health would last only a decade ringing in his ears, Mr Fong threw all his energies into making a good living.

'I knew I had a limited time to save some money for my family.'

What he did not count on was the fact that he would fall in love.

He met his wife Sheryl in 1991.

Two months after meeting her, he told her the truth about his kidney problem.

The couple were married in 1994.

Mrs Fong, a 37-year-old business development manager, said: 'It was the beginning of our 13-year trial together.

'He looked pretty normal to me when we first got married. He had a hectic work life, visiting his worksites, so he was tired and grouchy at the end of the day.

'I just thought we had to work on our communication, but didn't realise that his kidneys were also starting to fail bit by bit.'

Kidney failure
He got progressively weaker over the years, and things finally came to a head in 2000 - 22 years after he was diagnosed with chronic kidney disease, Mr Fong's kidneys finally failed.

He tried to carry on working throughout but had to go freelance as the toll on his body was too much.

Dialysis does some of the work of healthy kidneys, removing waste and water.

But it does not cure kidney disease.

Patients will need dialysis treatment for their whole life unless they are able to get a kidney transplant.

Without dialysis, the waste or urea that accumulates in the blood causes a toxicity called uraemia.

Side effects include vomiting, nausea, weakness and mental confusion.

Besides all those side effects, Mr Fong also suffered from insomnia and poor appetite - the result of a need to take a handful of pills four times a day, every day.

By the end of 2002, his condition had worsened.

He had breathing problems and couldn't lie down because he felt like he was choking.

He was also coughing a great deal and fainting frequently.

As a last resort to try to get some sleep, he would kneel on the floor, resting his head on the bed.

He did have one hope, even though he said it was a remote one.

'The protocol is to be put on the national transplant list. I was the 575th patient in line.

'Yearly, there are only five to seven transplants,' he said.

More complications
But even as he was hoping for a transplant, MrFong was dealt another blow: Hospital tests revealed that his bad kidneys had taken a toll on his heart. He had only 10 per cent of his heart function left.

His condition was so severe that he was taken off the transplant list and given six months to live.

This after finding out that his sister would be a suitable donor for him.

He said: 'That was the biggest blow in my life.'

Said Mrs Fong: 'It dashed his only hope, there was nothing left for him to look forward to.'

Then, in mid-2003, the dialysis suddenly stopped working. Instead of taking out the water and waste, 'I was putting it in', said Mr Fong.

'I looked like a balloon.'

This resulted in another stay in hospital to drain all the excess fluid. At one point, the water retention had made him balloon 20kg.

By now, Mr Fong was semi-conscious most of the time.

His appetite disappeared, and he ate only a bowl of porridge every few days, recalled his wife.

Doctors decided to try another form of dialysis, but this would involve pumping blood into the heart at a fast rate.

Mr Fong's heart muscles were so weak the doctors could not say if he would survive the dialysis.

'It was likely I'd have a heart attack and die on the spot. But if I didn't try, I'd die anyway,' he said.

It took two hours for each haemodialysis procedure.

With thrice-weekly blood dialysis, Mr Fong went from his water-inflated 78kg to 58kg in two months.

His heart, however, was not improving.

Ray of hope
In 2004, Mr Fong was referred to Dr Lye Wai Choong, a surgeon based at Mount Elizabeth Medical Centre.

Dr Lye previously had treated patients with the same condition.

Only this time, his sister was pregnant, ruling her out as a transplant donor.

With his time quickly running out, Mrs Fong decided to go for tests to see if she could give her kidney instead.

It wasn't a full match, but it was good enough.

On Oct 14, 2004, Mr Fong received the gift of life - a single kidney from his wife.

During their recovery, the couple said they decided to write an inspirational book to help other kidney patients.

He wanted to share how that helped him pull through the trauma.

Today, Mr Fong is doing well.

He still needs to take eight types of pills to make sure that his one kidney functions well and to prevent his body from rejecting the organ.

But he still says reverently that he deeply appreciates his life.

'Drinking, eating, sleeping and breathing are some daily activities that most people do so naturally,'wrote Mr Fong in the concluding chapter of the book.

'We all take them for granted. These activities may seem insignificant to others, but not too long ago, these simple gifts were taken away from me for a period of time...

'Not that these have been restored to me, I give thanks to God every day of my life.The experience has humbled me and made me a very grateful man.'

E-mail: elainey@sph.com.sg

Why Me, God?: Finding God In The Darkest Moments by Kenneth and Sheryl Fong is available in bookstores now. It can also be purchased for US$16 (S$25) at the publisher's website www.armourpublishing.com.

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'It was likely I'd have a heart attack and die on the spot. But if I didn't try, I'd die anyway.'
- Mr Kenneth Fong, on how he was so weak that the only option of blood dialysis was likely to kill him through the rapid pumping of blood into his weakened heart