ONE sure sign that a child is troubled is when his behaviour changes, and stays changed, especially if it follows a stressful event, such as when school starts.
For some children, every new school year brings a little fear. It may lead to trouble with sleep or a loss of pleasure in things he normally enjoys. He may be more clingy, shy, or become less confident.
If this goes on for more than a few days, parents may want to check with the teacher if the child is behaving normally in class.
Should the teacher say that the child is a little quiet but not giving any trouble, alarm bells should ring. 'It's the quiet kids we sometimes miss,' said Dr Daniel Fung of the Institute for Mental Health.
Parents need to find out what's troubling their child. Asking the child directly might not be a good idea if talking about emotions is not something the family does routinely.
Instead, Dr Fung suggests watching out for signs that the child might want to talk, and to give him the time when that happens. 'It is important to help the child face his fears. Don't laugh at his fears or ignore them,' he said.
One way is to share with the child your own problems and how you dealt with them. It tells them that even Mummy or Daddy has fears.
Another way to build up their resilience is to teach them skills - sports, doing chores at home or even learning to cook. Explained Dr Fung: 'If they can take care of themselves, they won't be so fearful. It's confidence that helps the kids.
'Kids who are most prone to becoming emotionally disturbed are insecure. They are not independent, they are very reliant on people.'
