By Genevieve Jiang

THE woman was dying.

The cancer in her ovary was so advanced, a tumour had grown in her abdomen that was blocking the passage of bowel motion through her intestines.

Yet, the Muslim woman, in her 50s, begged her doctor to let her leave the hospital. She wanted to go home, so she could make the pilgrimage to Mecca. It was a journey she would probably not survive.

Dr Rosalie Shaw asked her, 'What if you were to die in Mecca?'

Her answer: 'That is what I wish for. I would go straight up. To be able to go to Mecca is like being born again.'

Dr Shaw knew she had to help the woman fulfil her dying wish. She prepared the family members for the worst. They accepted. So the woman went, with only a topical patch attached to relieve her pain.

She asked Dr Shaw what clothing size she wore. She wanted to bring a robe back for the doctor as a souvenir. Dr Shaw did not receive her gift. The woman never returned.

The case, which is Dr Shaw's most memorable, is one of 48 short stories captured in a book she wrote recently.

Soft Sift in an Hourglass tells of her experiences in Singapore caring for the terminally-ill and families living with the dying.

Dr Shaw told The New Paper: 'I allowed her to go despite her condition, because to keep her in hospital would be to create physical, emotional and spiritual pain. As her doctor, my duty was to find ways to get her there with minimal pain.'

Dr Shaw came to Singapore in 1992 from Australia to be the medical director of the Hospice Care Association (HCA).

She has been a consultant with the Department of Palliative Medicine at the National Cancer Centre here since 1999. She has also been a visiting consultant with the KK Women's and Children's Hospital since 1997.

In the early days at HCA, Dr Shaw worked with only two nurses, a social worker, an administrator, and volunteers.

Often, her typical work day would stretch into the wee hours, when she would get calls from two or three patients a night.

'At the start, I had to get used to certain cultural differences. During some of my home visits, I observed that some Chinese families would cover the mouth and nose of the dead person with a fried egg, because they feared that toxic fumes would be emitted from the body.'

Dr Shaw has also seen her fair share of heartrending cases.

A chapter in her book captures the story of a woman who discovered a malignant ulcer in her stomach when she was 21.

She underwent treatment and the cancer went into remission for three years. In that time, she got married and had a child.

Cancer returned

But the cancer returned soon after she gave birth.

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