Rachelle Frederick is typical of most 11-year-old girls in Singapore.

The Indian-Chinese Singaporean at a mixed school loves American television sensation Miley Cyrus and pop idols like Carrie Underwood and Kelly Clarkson. She prefers wearing sleeveless tanktops on weekend outings as 'it's very hot here', and she borrows her mother's earrings to wear out on special occasions.

While Rachelle seems perfectly level-headed, her mother, Mrs Sharon Frederick, 39, still worries about her child growing up in a world rampant with commercialism and sexuality.

She has another daughter Robyn, aged nine.

She said: 'I've never allowed my daughters to play with Barbie dolls unless they're Christmas presents.

'Now I accept that it's okay to play with them but children still need an adult to guide them. I've told my daughters that there's no such thing as a perfect figure.'

Child psychologists Mind Your Body spoke to find such an approach sensible.

Ms Vanessa von Auer, clinic director of EVA Psychology Centre, said: 'Parents should be open with their children. They should focus on the positive traits of the child to reinforce the child's self-esteem and not on their material belongings.'

Ms M Gigi Durham, author of The Lolita Effect, which explores the sexualisation of tween girls, said: 'Families ought to think about age-appropriate content for children and monitor what kids watch and read. But you can't keep children in a bubble as we live in a media-saturated environment.

'The best thing we can do is to give kids the tools they need to cope with and control their interactions with the media.'

Experts like her urge parents to take time to explain to children how media images are often manipulated through airbrushing techniques.

Ms Frances Yeo, principal psychologist in the psychology service at KK Women's and Children's Hospital, said parents should also demonstrate healthy eating behaviours and avoid extreme actions like calorie counting.

She said: 'When a young adolescent is developing her own perception of her body image and self-image, she is very vulnerable.

Pressure from family members such as parents who are overly critical of their children's appearance can have a negative impact, she added.

Meanwhile, Rachelle - perched on the cusp of adolescence - is doing fine balancing today's norms about beauty and her parents' wishes for her to remain a carefree child.

Asked if being pretty or smart is more important to her, Rachelle said: 'Both. Being smart means being intelligent and that means I can learn more. I also want to be pretty because I'll feel good about myself and have more confidence.'

This article was first published in Mind Your Body on May 28, 2008.